I officially adopted our babies today. I haven't really talked about this on the blog yet I don't think, but today we finalized the second parent adoption. I think that is probably because I have mixed feelings about the adoption. No, no...don't worry, I'm not thinking about bailing and leaving Michelle to be a single mom to triplets!! She would kill me!!! But I have mixed feelings because while I want to celebrate that I am officially recognized as an equal parent to these babies as of today, I'm really quite pissed off that we have to go through this process at all. These are my babies and have been my babies from the moment we knew we were pregnant. There has never been the teeniest doubt for either of us that Michelle and I would be equal parents to these babies since they were mere twinkles in our eyes. It has been a long journey to get here and so I do want to celebrate the official status of us as a family of five, but the fact that it cost us about $2,000 to complete this adoption when any heterosexual couple wouldn't have to, even if they did IVF with donor sperm, gets under my skin.
If we still lived in Washington I would be automatically recognized as the second parent and would have been on the original birth certificate. But sadly, even if we lived in a state that recognized gay marriage we would have to do this second parent adoption so we were protected when traveling to states that don't recognize our relationship. I'm not a very political person, but I get pretty incensed when I think about all the ways I would rather spend that $2,000!! We are lucky though that PA allows second parent adoption because in some states we would have had to go through a full home study instead of just this simple formality. So it's time for me to let this go and just be thankful that I'm officially Isaiah, Avery, & Ellie's mommy as of today!
If we still lived in Washington I would be automatically recognized as the second parent and would have been on the original birth certificate. But sadly, even if we lived in a state that recognized gay marriage we would have to do this second parent adoption so we were protected when traveling to states that don't recognize our relationship. I'm not a very political person, but I get pretty incensed when I think about all the ways I would rather spend that $2,000!! We are lucky though that PA allows second parent adoption because in some states we would have had to go through a full home study instead of just this simple formality. So it's time for me to let this go and just be thankful that I'm officially Isaiah, Avery, & Ellie's mommy as of today!
The event itself was pretty quick and easy. As usual everyone was excited about the triplets and a couple extra people came to the hearing just because the judge had been telling people she was doing a triplet adoption today! :). After the hearing it was so warm and nice out we decided to take a walk around town and through Tallyrand park and then get lunch at the cafe to celebrate. We walked to the cute local toy store to browse and then started toward the park and cafe. Unfortunately about a block into the second half of our walk it started raining! It was raining pretty hard so we decided to bag our plans and just head home where we hung out by the fireplace for a bit listening to the pounding rain.
Here are a few pics to commemorate the event :) Thanks to Auntie Jess for taking all the pics!
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| Our "official" family of five & the judge |
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| The judge wanted to hold a baby too! |
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| All dressed up for the occasion! His bowtie matched my sweater perfectly =) |
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outside the courthouse
Me & my babies
the fam
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I had a friend from high school who had to do the full blow eval & whatnot for her son, that was born of her egg that her wife carried through pregnancy. (http://girlsseekinggabber.blogspot.com/search?q=second+parent+adoption) They were treated as basically a surrogacy case, legally. Wacky legal waters!
ReplyDeleteThe picture of the judge is a hoot!
Congratulations Therrien Family! I felt the same way while reading this, so happy for you guys and so enraged at the same time! But it's done and you can move on happily!
ReplyDeleteI second the love of that pic with the judge holding a baby! Congrats on being official!
ReplyDeleteAs usual, your blogposts make me a little weepy. So very happy for you.
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on being the legal Mommy with Michelle. Even though you are actually the biological Mommy and Mommy of the heart!! Best Moms ever! You have a beautiful family. Love Isaiah's tux...he will laugh when he is older. Or else the girls will have a laugh at his expense! We agree--the law sucks but everyone who knows you both knows you are a family!!! Love to all of you from both of us!
ReplyDeleteCongrats!!!! We live in Nashville, TN and we have to do a home study and all sorts of other stuff for our 2nd parent adoption. Because of that, we are going to wait until our family is complete before we make it official... We still want one or two more babies!
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